And they all lived UnHapPily ever after

I've been in a few relationships and I find that as time progresses it becomes harder and harder to walk away from each failed one. Usually there's a post relationship evaluation period for me, here i think about things like:
what i did wrong
what he did wrong
how to heal from this one
what i'm looking for in the next one

Ask K. Mack; he'll tell you that after every failed relation i swear off men, but as i find myself exiting yet another failed relationship i find that rather than going through the evaluation checklist i'm actually hopeful. This was not the best relationship i've had but i found that as time progressed and i became relegated to girlfriend in hiding (this is like after the 50th break up), i realized that i wasn't getting what i wanted. Maybe it sounds selfish but the least i expect from my man is for him to be considerate!! I certainly don't expect to be wear the title "girlfriend who is less important than the female friends"....If you treat me like that then how're they supposed to treat me??

Now i have to give him his props, he's a great listener and he was a great friend but I just find it funny that the sweetest, charming most romantic male turned into an insensitive, inconsiderate boyfriend.... I told him everything i didn't like/respect or appreciate and he did it anyway....and then he has the gall to ask ME to not do things that he doesn't like/respect.

***Insert laughter here***

After my bout of psychochickitis.... a disease i PRAY fervently to never catch again......( ooh but how i wish he was near enough for me to kick him in the shins...sigh), i've decided to just move on, after all i'm only hurting myself in all this, he's fine.

So on to the new, maybe not a new man just yet, but the rest of 2009 is gonna be dedicated to new projects....anything to fill the space.

Out with the old and in with the NEW!!!

To err is human

In order to keep my sanity while i go through my present situation i have decided to take up blogging again, this is my first one in a long while so forgive me if i ramble on aimlessly.

I have once again found myself in the exact situation i was in exactly 3 months ago now alot of people are gonna say i told you so and how could you be so foolish. In reality i ask myself the same thing, HOW could i let this happen again. Truthfully i believed he would change, i believed he would see his mistakes and change for me. How childish and unbelievable right...i mean how can you mistake the evil bastard with Prince Charming ? In reality i'm starting to give up on all that fairy tale stuff, maybe i should have a long time ago it would've prevented all this hurt now

Right now i'm crying as i write this i fought hard for a relationship and a friendship i believe in only to have him give it up because it suits him right now. The water falls from my eyes too easily considering i've been here before with him already, considering i've done this exact thing before. I thought that this time around i would see it coming and i'd stop it, i thought i could stop myself from getting hurt but what can i say i was a fool. To everyone who warned me, you were right!! and i'm sorry i ever defended him.....he is a lying cheating hurtful bastard who's only interested in self gratification. I forgave him once and he did the same thing...no more

To err is human, to forgive divine......divinity hurts, don't forgive!